January 31, 2010

Do You Feel Like You Are Too Nice?

 
Why Men Love Bitches by Sherry Argov.
                                                                                
                                                 I think this book is a must-read. I would recommend this book
                                                 without  reservation.
                                                 Every woman knows what it feels like to be taken for granted.
                                                 These problems are common to most women married and single
                                                 alike.
                                                 The author provides compelling answers to the tough questions
                                                 women often ask:
                                                 * Why a strong woman is much more desirable than a      
                                                  a "yes woman" who routinely sacrifices herself? (oh, how that
                                                  reminds me of my mum).
                                                 * Why are men so romantic in the beginning and why do they
                                                 change?
                                                 * What does a man respect a woman when she stands up
                                                  for herself?
                                                  The author explains.."the bitch I'm talking about is not the
                                                  bitch on wheels or the mean-spirited character that
                                                  Joan Collins played on Dynasty nor is it the classic office
                                                  bitch who is hated by everyone at work.
                                                  Success in love isn't about looks; it's about attitude and
                                                  presence of mind."
                                                  This is the woman who plays by her own rules, who has
                                                  a feeling of confidence and empowerment.
                                                  I absolutely share author's views. 
                                                  Actually, men like it when a woman has a bit of an edge to her.
                                                  So, lovely ladies...
                                                  Don't always say "yes!"

                                                  What do you think?  I'd love to hear. I am always interested in
                                                  your views. xx             

86 comments:

Kristin said...

I think both men and women dig a big of edge in each other...as long as it doesn't morph into nastiness! Guess what lovely lady? You won our Fifi Flowers Frameable notecard giveaway! Come check out today's post for the details. : )

Sam said...

AMAZING!!!!!!! I need to get this book. I am constantly a giver and never get the same in return in my relationships. Thank you for sharing, such an empowering post. All my love :)

Pres. Kathy said...

Hope you are having a nice weekend!

yonca said...

Oh, great book to read.Thanks for the review. Happy Sunday Betty!

Secretia said...

I will try not to say yes so automatically, as it is my nature.

Betty's Cuisine said...

It seems I am a constant giver too, but I do not expect to change at this age!
In any case, I would love to read that book...

Lorenza said...

Ah... I agree, Betty...To stand up, as women, is to respect ourselves. Consequently, everybody's else, including "the boys", respect us...Just experienced now in my life...xxx

NorthWestLondonGirlInTheCountry said...

Or as my grandmother told me, "always hold something back, never let any man have or know all of you". I think these are wise words. I'm never nasty and love and adore HH, but am sometimes just a bit cool with him. xx

Sarah RDH said...

This revelation occured to me right before I met my husband. When we first started dating, maybe about 2 weeks into it, I told him I will not put up with any shit, and if he ever cheated on me, i don't care if we're married for 50 years, I'd leave his ass and not think twice, bc if he's a cheater & a liar, than the person I thought he was didn't really exist anyway, so I wouldn't shed a tear. He told me that was a 'little harsh". I told him I've been through too much, always giving and giving to others, I'm sick of it, this is the way it is. 5 years later....I still wear the pants. lol

Tracie said...

I think the thing that attracts us can eventually become the thing that drives us away.

plainolebob said...

Betty, ahhheemm, sorry thought i better clear my.........errrr......thoughts, seems to me that i have run into this woman before..........both types that is.
all I can say, is
BIG HUGS hope it all stays where it stays

that is a plainolebob perspective, love all you ladies

Steven Anthony said...

Ive always been atracted to the Joan collins kinda tv woman, but in real life not so much:)

peace my friend

Rae said...

Maybe I need to get the book for my husband to read. I am edgy, bitchy, and I stand up for myself. He would rather have me the other way, but it is too late for me to change. I am too old and set in my ways :)

Journaling Woman said...

noooo, I don't think I am too nice. But, I am very nice. My motto is "You teach people how to treat you". If you (not you of course)aren't respectful to me then perhaps...you might see a side of me you wouldn't like. But you would never forget how to treat me the second time. :) I'm just saying.

I have no problem saying no, it is just a part of life.

Nevine said...

Yes, sometimes I think we women can be too nice. But sometimes men are nice as well. I think it really depends on the dynamics of how both personalities work together. But absolutely, women tend to always be nice... yes!

Nevine

Willoughby said...

This sounds like a great book! Thanks for recommending it.

Richard @ The Bewildered Brit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
gayle said...

I don't think anyone would say I am a "Yes" lady!! I agree.

Nicole said...

Dad and I passed an Award on to you

xoxo Nicole :)

http://iblogyourprofile.blogspot.com/2010/01/kick-ass-blogger-award.html

athina said...

Interesting!

corvedacosta said...

Men are not romantic anymore because they got what they wanted so there is no need to impress and be better.

Dayne Gingrich said...

There's nothing I love more than a woman ... now my wife... who stands up for herself and her beliefs. THE RESPECT THAT COMES FROM THAT IS UNMEASURABLE!

Don't let the men run you over... stand your ground, be strong, and never ever settle for less!

Phivos Nicolaides said...

It looks an interesting book. Have to read it!

Farila said...

I always thought I was a bitch.. Thanks Betty for changing my mind. Now to find and read that book.
Whew! It is nice to have my say here.. I hated going back without saying anything last time.

Misalyn said...

Need to get a copy of this book (wishing for a holiday so that I can sit and relax and read)

I agree with your views. I think this 'edge' makes men interested more to a 'bitch' woman.

Have a great start of the week.

Λίλα said...

Καλή εβδομάδα και καλό μήνα!!!

blueviolet said...

I think you have to have a little toughness to you so you don't get walked on! ;)

Kimberley said...

I think I tend to be too nice about a lot of things, mostly related to work situations though. I'm also a little shy with people I don't know well which lends itself to an easy yes. It's much easier to say yes in a tense situation than to stick up for yourself and say no.

Sounds like an interesting book...

Hope you had a great weekend :)

Nikki said...

ooo this book looks awesome!!!! I want one!! :) I think its absolutely true about how women need to be a little "bitchy" because that is whats respected in todays world. I'm working on that, I feel I am definetly too nice sometimes.

Erin said...

I am too nicey-nice sometimes, so I can see where this book might help me out with that...but my hubs is pretty sex deprived (or so he'd have you believe), so I'm not sure where that fits into the mix.

flying eagle woman said...

I think sometimes we perceive ourselves as "nicey nice" when in actuality many of us ARE bitches on wheels so to speak...we have our clever ways of disguising...

please refer to my blog "i'm not nice" http://flyingeaglewoman.blogspot.com/2009/08/im-not-nice.html

At any rate I can't wait to read the book - thank you for recommending it my friend!!!

Happy Monday!!!
Shawna

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

here is my motto

TREAT 'EM MEAN
KEEP 'EM KEEN

Naqvee said...

HI Betty, im a very mellow +soft hearted, extremely emotional, and not so dominant, Miss J kind of girl in my relationship but highly competitive, strong headed, energized with a. iron-will power +a hard nut to crack for others.

I receive love because i'm always the first to give others just reflect what they get.

This review was awesome.

and Betty, my blog name will always be same. My banners will keep changing.

hugssssss Naqvee

Betty Manousos:cutand-dry.blogspot.com said...

Naqvee, thanks, glad you liked it.
But Naqvee, you're awesome! Your personality is great!. You just impressed me. You always do. And you are only 22 year old.
xx

Together We Save said...

I am very stong willed!! I am not sure this makes me more disireable, LOL.

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

I am in to this!! I am ready to read it!

English Rose ♥ said...

i always feel like I am too nice to people who arent as nice or giving back - im going to check it out

Thanks so much for the wonderful comment, i hope you visit the blog again soon, great blog by the way =]

Stay safe and chic darling,
English Rose x
http://iamanenglishrose.blogspot.com

Valentine Devlieghere said...

You have a great blog!
Best of luck! ;)

Follow me if you want on http://ptitevalentine-be.blogspot.com/

x Valentine

Tzoules said...

GOOD WORK WITH UR BLOG!
NICE PICS =)


I HOPE U VISIT ME AS SOON AS U CAN =)
FEEL FREE TO FOLLOW ME =)
GREETINGS FROM GERMANY !
TZOULES K

athina μπασιούκα said...

Έχω διαβάσει πολλά βιβλία συμβουλευτικής σχέσεων αλλά με σιγουριά μπορώ να σου πω ότι το συγκεκριμένο είναι μακράν το καλύτερο. Οι συμβουλές που δίνει είναι για πραγματικές γυναίκες και φέρνουν αποτέλεσμα. Χώρια που ο τίτλος του είναι πολύ αστείος!
Πολύ καλό είναι και το Why men marry bitches της ίδιας συγγραφέως.

Tzoules said...

thanks for ur nice comment =)


of course i follow u back =)

visit u soon ;)

JMay said...

That book was AMAZING. I read it before I got engaged, coincidence? ;-)

The Blonde Duck said...

I think men like confidence, not bitchiness.

Dean C said...

Thanks for the message. I love your photos.

ritsa said...

I have read taht book. Awesome!

Ted said...

Yes , We do so.!Love bitches!

Melissa B. said...

Then most men MUST love moi! Seriously...

Christopher said...

Life is boring if you aren't challenged, especially from your partner. Sure having clean underwear is great but is that really any kind of basis for a relationship? Women generally all want a man with confidence, why wouldn't men?

Antarman said...

a man respect a woman when she stands for herself?..this is true for every sphere in life..people respect only those who respect themselves..I believe in a fair play..no exploitation by anyone, neither by men, nor women.but love and compassion for all and some sacrifice for family is not such a bad word in my dictionery.

Unknown Mami said...

I am not "nice", I am more of a "hard headed woman".

shashibhushantamare-kpsystem said...

nice post !
as you recommended, i would like to have one.
its human nature, he cares not whatever he has and craves for whatever he can not.
thanks a lot.

buddeshepherd said...

Thanks for looking at my blog, now I'm looking at yours.
I think I would have to say that it depends on what point in your life you are at. The women we date are not always the ones we should marry.
There is a fine line between having principles and knowing what you want, and being a pain in the arse.
If you are young and hot you can get away with a lot.
I've seen the book before and have mixed feelings.

Eternally Distracted said...

Sounds like a fab book... although not sure I'll find it on the shelves here ;0)

English Rose ♥ said...

a link exchange would be great by the way, i'll add you to my blogroll right away

Stay safe and chic darling,
English Rose x
http://iamanenglishrose.blogspot.com

Realliveman said...

Nice Blog. I will be back for more!

....Petty Witter said...

Interesting. I've been described as being nauseatingly nice so perhaps I ought to read this.

Sam said...

Hey, thanks for stopping by my blog!! :)

Have a great day!

Lynette said...

My DH does not take me for granted even after 31 years he is still very much in love with me and always take me into consideration with all his decisions.

Zanah said...

OMG my sister has the first book which I am borrowing to read!! :) Mon Mode Blog

KOSTAS PAPAPOSTOLOU said...

Women should sometimes say no. I agree. But what about women, do they like a yes man? This is another question.

The Blonde Duck said...

Update: My co-workers told me I was too nice today!

Tzoules said...

heyy =)


yes ..i know the problem with the bitches.

Kate said...

I think sometimes a bit of powerplay can make thigns more sexually charged. Then again sometimes i can be a total doormat depends on the guy....

Kate xx

Georgia said...

I 've read this book and i think it's quite helpful.

sonia said...

Amazing!! I need to get this book,
thanks for recommending it.
:)

3 hungry tummies said...

Haha thanks for sharing your thoughts :) xxx

Jennifer Fabulous said...

Great post! I totally need to get this book!! :)

septembermom said...

My sarcasm probably gives me my edginess in my marriage. Outside of marriage, I'm probably too nice for some people's taste. I think this is an interesting book. Thanks for pointing it out to us.

Helene said...

I've seen this book at Borders and wondered what it was about. Hmmm, I could probably stand to read it...LOL! Thanks for sharing your opinion!

SquirrelQueen said...

Just the fact that I had lived on my own in Alaska for ten years and worked as a sales rep for a major company probably gave my guy a hint that I wasn't a 'yes' woman. I'm not overpowering but I do speak my mind. Hubby seems to like it, we've been married 15 years. Oh, did I mention he's ten years younger?

Momma Fargo said...

I just joined your blog on Aion's recommendation. Read some of your posts. Loved reading it so far and when I get more time, I will check in and read from start to finish.

tea darling? said...

And thankyou so kindly for being my first follow. Much appreciated. Hope you have a lovely day.

wenn said...

i would love to read the books!

Being Me said...

I want that book...

I need that book...

BM

JT said...

Thank you for your nice comment (have had a few blogs before this though :)). Have a great rest of the week.

OceanDreams said...

Now that you have described it as confidence, I think that is very important in a relationship. I think there is a lot of giving and receiving, it goes both ways and everything needs to be communicated about. Looks like a great read!

The Blonde Duck said...

We should all dance more!

Menopausal New Mom said...

I wish I had the time to read. That 15 hours in the air would have been perfect if I hadn't had to spend it coloring and drawing Lol!

Mama Zen said...

My husband will be home soon. I think that I'll test out the theory!

ρομπερτ said...

How interestig to read. Being male, it is indeed way to often that I do feel being "too nice" and exploited...
Please have you a wonderful Thursday.

The Peach Tart said...

I can be bitchy with the best of them.

presious said...

It did not take too many relationships before I simply gave up on attempting to have one. I have grown quite content being on my own.

I do believe there are some relationships that do work, however, it takes "work" to make them successful. Relationships take compromise, compansion, commuication, sacrifice, true commitment, and lots and lots of hard hard work.

Personally, I don't like answering to anyone. I know I am not good marriage material. I am divorced and chose to stay divorced. My ex and I are good friends as we were before we married. We have 4 beautiful children and 1 grandson.

I've had proposals that I have turned down. I know that sounds mean, but we had a discussion and an understanding. He chose to ask, over and over again lol! Yes, we remain friends today :).

I will give what I have, but then I will observe how it is being recieved and reciprocated. If it is not being reciprocated in some way, I simply stop giving.

No, I don't think I am too nice. I believe in being respectfully honest & upfront. I do not believe in leading a person on, even if it means hurting their feelings. I try to be gentle with my words, but clear in their meaning.

Secretia said...

Betty, they don't want us to be bitches, but they often make us that way!

Secretia

Pat said...

I totally agree that MOST men don't like women to be pushovers. Yet there are those men who like to TOTALLY control their women.

Cheri Pryor said...

I totally agree...but I think it's true for both male AND females.

Alyssa said...

My friend said that Why Bitches Love Women completely transformed her relationship and now she's happy!

I'm following you back. =)